missing december

{june, minutes old.  

just wondering how she started out looking like this and now i can hardly remember her this way?}

when i look at the blog at how much i haven't written lately, it tells me a couple of things:

1)  i'm probably not taking great care of myself.  because i love to write, and love to think about things to write, and love taking pictures and writing about them.  then looking at how much i haven't done these things, i'm wondering what i've substituted as an outlet for me lately?  and why do all of my pants feel too tight?  and where did the rest of that ice cream go?  hmmmmm....

2)  it's the end of another really tough semester.....for both ben and myself.  holy toledo, am i glad this one is over.  why is it that the wives of grad students don't earn some sort of certificate when this is all over?  or at least enough chocolate and massages to last a year?

3)  i am busy.  that's all there is to it.  sometimes so busy that i feel like i'm not sure which way is up.  and this is definitely a busy time of year, complete with illnesses, parties, working, selling cars, buying cars, endless laundry, the random medical mystery of my strange knee continuing, baking, fighting with our insurance company yet again, planning and planning christmas surprises, and a lot of happiness in between the madness.


i had a little bit of a nervous breakdown last week.  just felt like something had to give before i gave.  but luckily i caught myself before i went over the edge, voiced my needs, and got out for a couple of much-needed hours.  sometimes that's all it takes to return ready to dive back in.

life is good though, isn't it?  here it is, almost christmas.  i just love christmas.  the tree, the lights, giving presents to others, to my children and husband.  opening the mail and getting so excited to get another christmas card from friends.  

i'll tell you what, it's my new year's goal for 2012 to send out family christmas cards, because i really love receiving them.  plus it would force us to actually get a real family photo taken.  what would that be like?  it hasn't happened since caleb was 2.  a sad and true fact, which is going to be changed, mark my words.

well this was a lot of writing about not much.  i'm tired, and surrounded by sleeping family members.  i'm going to join them, and enjoy the rest of this december that has gone by so quickly.