When men should have bangs--Confronting Anemia--and Naked Windows. (Or, a small and somewhat meaningless update.)

{the morning after we moved.}

I am supposed to be working, while watching one of the two shows I actually sit down for during the week.

No, this isn't true.  I'm supposed to be cutting Ben's hair, which he has been asking me to do for about two weeks now--but he fell asleep on the lower bunk where Leah and June sleep together (vertically, in their full-sized bunk bed) while trying to get June to "calm down and stop pretending to karate chop her Curious George blankie."  Those were my words, not his, that I said to June right before Ben switched me places and I came out to the family room to settle my swollen feet on the ottoman next to the couch to begin my nightly computer work.

However, he fell asleep, so I don't feel guilty that the haircut isn't happening for yet another night.  Besides, I really like his hair long, when it begins to curl.  This is something we've disagreed about for going on 12 years of marriage, and I will admit there have been times when I've avoided those haircuts as long as I possibly can so I can enjoy one more day looking at the dark curls that grow.  "Men should not have bangs!"  Has been his motto.  Sometimes I agree with this--but in his case, I do not.

Anyway, I sat down to work and instead began reading blogs and started wondering if there would be a time when my words would come back to me to write again....it has been a long, long time.  I miss this side of me.  So, I decided to just begin.

The months that have passed so quickly have provided our family with a lot of twists and turns.  Caleb turned 9, June turned 3, I turned 34, Ben turned 35, we went to Utah to visit family, Ben found a new job, we made it through another stifling Arizona summer, the older two kids began school, Ben passed his dissertation defense, and....we have unexpectedly moved (again).

I'm attempting to gain the attitude of expecting the unexpected with our lives, because that is the way it continues to go--thinking that the element of shock and stress and surprise will leave and I can roll with it better.  Or this is my hope.

I could tell I was in a funk when we had been in the house for 3 weeks and not one picture or curtain had been hung yet.  Not one!  This is unheard of, for me.  I worried I was depressed, honestly.  Or just avoiding the unpacking because I'm anticipating another move in our future and leaving everything ready to go at a moment's notice.  It turns out neither of these was true.

About 3 weeks ago, at the doctor's office for my glucose pregnancy blood test (so extremely un-fun), I was told I have a severe case of pregnancy-induced anemia.  How it was caused is unsure and something the midwife/doctor team is still puzzled about, referring me to a hematologist to double-check things next week.  In the mean time, I have been put on a high dose of iron and have been informed to take this matter seriously.

Week one and two of my iron dose seemed relatively the same, but last week--something clicked.  The iron pumping through my system started working and I began to feel human again.  I no longer had to come home from dropping the older two kids off at school and beg June to watch a movie so I could lay like a zombie on the couch or sleep until it was time to pick up Leah from half-day kindergarten.  I no longer lived on Tylenol or Excedrine (the one without aspirin) because of the constant and persistent headache I had been enduring for almost 4 months.  The room no longer spun each time I stood up.  I no longer had bouts of time (sometimes up to 20 minutes or more) where I struggled to breathe and my heart could not slow down.

And, I began hanging pictures on the walls.

I'm now answering phone calls, scheduling play dates, making dinner, and occasionally taking my kids to the park.  Every day no longer feels like I'm crawling my way through it, but actually getting up and walking through, with possibly a small spring in that step, even.  May not sound like a big deal for some, but unfortunately just existing day to day had become my story before the iron supplement.

Though I'm not grateful for the overly and intentionally sweetened glucose drink I had to consume that day in the doctor's office, I am grateful this anemia was discovered through that glucose test, and handled so I can come back to life just before this fourth baby enters our world.

Our new home is beginning to feel like us.  Curtains still need to be hung though.  Why do windows look so naked to me without them??  We will get there.

For now, I will settle with finally writing something, and getting to look at Ben's curly bangs one day longer than planned.

Also?  This is me, just after drinking that nasty sugary drink, before the iron supplement began, at 29 weeks along.  Anyone in the mood for a cupcake?

living in a Moment.

Yesterday's late March afternoon was unusual for the simple fact that Ben was home.  Most weekdays, it's rare when we are in the same place at the same time before 10 pm.

The girls were playing in the toy room, and I could hear their squeals and screeches as the ponies in their hands danced and jumped.  They had purposely dressed themselves alike today, in matching grey t-shirts and poofy skirts.  In between fighting, they have become very good friends.

I found myself laying stomach-down on the white comforter of our master bed, only feet away from Caleb who was sitting at the desk finishing homework.  In between helping answer his questions, I was reading a sentence here and there, desperately trying to finish the book I had started over the weekend while I was away on vacation.  I was determined to finish it--the pile on my night stand of half-read novels was getting too high.  Besides, I had been swallowed up by the characters and couldn't leave them until I knew what happened in the end.

It was right as I read the sentence when one of the characters in the book died, that Ben joined me on the bed, laying down the same way so the sides of our arms were touching.  He was texting a friend who needed advice about a car their family was buying.

Though I was engrossed in my book, I felt my senses becoming aware of my surroundings--something I usually tune out when enveloped in words on the page.  I heard the soft whirring of the ceiling fan, the light scratching of Caleb's pencil on his paper, the tick-tick-ticking of Ben's phone as he replied in text, and the girls' sometimes shrill but happy noises.  I felt the comfort of skin from my arm touching Ben's, and became aware I had absentmindedly hooked one of my feet around his, bouncing it up and down on the bed as I was reading.  I saw the afternoon sun coming through our bedroom window, softly enhancing shapes and shadows.

As my senses heightened to the moment I was living in, I remembered words from a television show I had once heard,

"You know how people talk about the Good Ole' Days?  I wish you could know they were the Good Ole' Days when you were actually in them."

I closed my book, laying still, focusing.  I thought of taking a picture so I wouldn't forget what was happening, but didn't want to disturb anything.  Instead I climbed on top of Ben, resting my head on his back, my cheek against his shoulder blade, wrapping my arms around him so they were in-between his chest and the bed.

I knew I had been caught up in the story of the dying character, but as I clung to Ben I faced the thought that one day I would not have the opportunity to wrap my arms around him, or help Caleb with his homework, or listen to my girls happily imagine.

"Well this is nice, what is this for?"  Ben asked about my sudden change in position.

"This life, that we've created together," I began, and stopped because I could feel emotion welling inside of me.  "We just have a really good life, and I'm grateful for it."  

I lay there quietly for a few minutes, letting the beauty of our right now consume me.  And then Caleb finished his homework, and the girls chased each other into our bedroom, and life began moving forward again.

catching up with our 3rd grader.

well, let's take a break for a minute from the intense, shall we?  i know i need it.  i have to be in "the zone" to write those emotionally-charged posts, and then i need a rest.

so, onto a-day-in-the-life-business!

the kids have started school.... 

caleb is in third {what?!} grade, loving his teacher who i believe is going to be amazing for him.  he's in a class with a few of his friends and doing fantastic academically and socially.  his hand dexterity is still a little behind--as much as i tell myself at the beginning of each summer that we will keep up on these things, life and having fun always seems to take precedence--so what do i expect?  but he's reading on a 5th and 6th grade level, flying through spelling and math and whatever else they throw at him.  sometimes i think he might get a little bored with it all, {he's expressed it a few times} but it's okay, because he's excelling and feels confident in this area.  much more so than he does physically, which seems to be his constant uphill battle.

today he told me that another kid asked him if he was in kindergarten....i told him to get used to it, because i clearly remember the day a kindergartner came up to me to point out she was taller than me--when i was in the sixth grade. 

he seems to be rolling with the punches now, those that seem to swing at us short folk.  this is a big improvement from the past two years, when these things used to devastate him.  but he seems to be really enjoying the school year so far, and quite possibly gunning for the role of "funny kid."  when i hear the things he says and does at school, sometimes i have to fight from covering my face in my hands because i'm not sure whether to laugh or be completely embarrassed, but i keep my composure.  he's seeming to find his niche, and is really well-liked in school by others--so i say, if he wants to smack himself in the rear and dance around like a fool to make his friends laugh, but he feels confident while doing it, then go for it!

he's back to playing piano, and i've seen again how hard and good this is for him.  his little fingers don't work the way he thinks they should, and he can become easily frustrated.  when i sit down and play with him, we get through it much easier.

we're signing him up for karate this week, and soccer starts in a month.  he is still very weak and seriously stiff, with underdeveloped muscles--although that is improving.  when he's overdone it at school during recess, his legs ache and it's hard for him to walk.  i am so grateful that even though he can be easily physically taxed and worn out, he has so much desire to do it.  i can't imagine what strings we'd have to pull if that desire didn't compel him to keep trying.

he loves spending time with ben or myself one-on-one...whether it's a run to the grocery store, or building legos--he doesn't care.  he just loves the undivided attention, and i can't blame him.  sometimes because he's older and more independent, we assume he's just fine without as much of a need for emotional filling-up from us.  ben and i decided to make a more concerted effort to focus on quality time with him.  

this kid is so lovable.  he is honest and silly, obedient and easily excited, wears his emotions on his sleeve, a complete and true extrovert, and growing up before my very eyes.  i'd love it if he stopped trying to control his little sisters, but realize this is him working out his independence.  we just keep it in check.

favorite books right now:  diary of a wimpy kid series, captain underpants series {where i'm sure he gathers his best one-liners for his comedy routine at school}, the magic treehouse series {he reads them in one day}, how to train your dragon series, and mysteries.

favorite shirts:  star wars, wolverine, angry birds, and anything that looks "tough."

favorite sports:  football and soccer.

favorite tv shows:  teenage mutant ninja turtles, wild kratts, avatar {the cartoon series}

favorite movies:  chicken little, the rise of the guardians, despicable me 1 & 2, the kroogs

favorite ipad game:  clash of clans


here's to another great school year!

woah.

why didn't someone try to stop me from moving in the middle of arizona summer, right before a 3 week long vacation?  no one thought to bring me to my senses?  give me a good smack across the face and shake of the shoulder to get me to snap out of it?  this was a move of choice, remember.  not a mold-induced, career-induced or school-induced move.  i take responsibility for it, most of the time.  the rest of the time i blame the lack of common sense on two things:

1)  the heatstroke--it always sinks in on or around june 17.  this year was no exception.

2)  the desperation for space.  and, oh!  the space here is so nice. 

the space is what allows me to somehow find a way to move around open boxes and half-emptied tubs of our belongings without constantly banging my shins and elbows.  a piece of me questioned the move in the name of space--am i just getting greedy?  whining about first world problems? or am i actually just desperate, and possibly extremely intelligent?  desperate to park our van in our garage instead of using it as storage because there is no other space for storage...desperate to fit an actual dresser in a child's room instead of the plastic bins inside of a closet that last about 5 months before frustrated little hands break them while trying to remove a set of pj's...desperate to have my 4 year old back with her in her own room for her apnea-induced awake periods routinely every night between 3am-5am... 

the extremely intelligent part comes from only increasing our rent around $100 a month for this space.

so, i'm going to stick with those two reasons.

but. 

this is a lot.  we're leaving bright and early in the morning for our 12 + hour drive up to utah, and once we are on the road i will release a huge sigh and try to forget about the fact that my eyes twitch over the naked windows without curtains hung.  yes, i said naked.  those windows look so vulnerable and stark to me and the inner non-professional decorator just wants to grab the drill and go to town!  but so many other things are tugging me that for the first time in all of our moves, i have not hung up pictures and rearranged books first.  i have unpacked the boring before anything else--kitchen utensils and underwear, sheets and towels.  that last sentence was so boring it made me yawn while typing it.  i need color!  beauty!  a room that makes me want to hum a song just by walking into it!

but,

it's okay.  i'm getting a little purposely over-the-top even though deep down, it is really how i feel about the order of setting up a home.  i can't help it.

so,  i will try to forget about those un-hung curtains.  i will try to forget that my skin has broken out so badly that i look in the mirror and try to recall a time when i didn't have pimples--has there been a time?  possibly not.

i will try to forget that when we arrive back home it will be august, and in a few days caleb will start school, and we need to prepare for leah's tonsillectomy and ben's likely impending job quittage so he can get this dissertation DONE.

right now, as i finish packing suitcases among unpacked boxes, i will focus on the sound of the ocean--the fake one, coming from the white noise machine next to my side of the bed.  i will close my eyes as i roll up clothing into tight balls and stuff one shoe here and the other other there, filling up travel-size shampoo bottles and wrapping up computer cords, and i will hear that sound and focus on the fact that in just a little over one week, the sound of those crashing waves will be

real.

we made it.

we survived, we're getting settled, and i am {still} loving the floor plan of this home.  {it's the same one as the moldy house so we're all set up as far as curtains/trash cans/shower curtains go}  the bedrooms all upstairs, every kid in their own room, big master bedroom with enormous walk-in closet.  and bonus!  there's already grass in the backyard, AND it's mold-free.  so aside from the strange color they decided to paint the outside, it's a win, win, win.

of course, leah has informed us that they painted it this color just for her....and i won't let her believe any different.

we've had so much help the past couple of weeks, and i literally do not know how we could have pulled it off without the support of our friends here, babysitting, and packing, and loading up their trucks & cars to make this happen.  we're so grateful.

i'm on my way first thing in the morning to fly to utah for the weekend for a friend's wedding---boarding the ever-trusty Allegiant Airlines {sarcasm} to see what new adventures can ensue.  will the engine need to be manually started again?  how long will my flight be delayed?  i'm setting my expectations low so that if all goes well, i can start the weekend off on the right foot.

anyway, there's so much to write about--getting sentimental about the last home we lived in for 2 years, the results of leah's two sleep studies, what the next step is, and how i've learned yet again to trust my gut and fight for it--even if sometimes i look like an idiot initially.  or maybe not just initially.  :)

i'm hoping to have a little time to write this weekend, because the days at home have been so full of distractions and unpacking and trying to give my kids the attention they need.  i'll be busy but responsibility-free.

more to come!

the best parts of me.

sometimes i get so caught up in writing about something that i forget to write about the daily life constantly swirling around me.  i think i put undue pressure on myself to write everything up to a certain standard i've set for myself.

then i realize there is so much more than my own standards and i need to just let go a bit.

oh, these three.


i've been pushed to my limits lately in motherhood.  i've seen some of the ugliest parts of me come through the past few weeks and woah boy!  all that i thought i knew, i've had to scale back and readjust.  i'm usually not too hard on myself when it comes to how i work with my kids--i see they're shaping out to be some incredible little humans, and i know a part of that is because of all of the teaching that goes on around here.

but after i see the ugly inside, and cry a time or two about it, and apologize and push myself to do better, i feel renewed and determined instead of defeated.  so the ugly can be good, even when the molding part of it can feel draining sometimes.  because the ugly and molding is where i find grace.

caleb has matured lately in such a nice way.  suddenly he's less emotionally reactive, and can stay calm even when facing things he's opposed to.  i used to wish and wonder if this would ever happen.  he's always been intelligent and observant, but is also bursting at the seams with emotions.  this new mellow-ness has been such a nice change and has brought a friendship between the two of us that i am absolutely loving.

he's also growing up in the way that's brought some fun conversations....about body parts, and why they change, and what purpose they were made for.  we talked to him about the birds and the bees over a year ago, and have a lot of follow-up conversations. i love that we can explain it to him with simple clarity, no beating around the bush, and he takes it in stride.  i can see the wheels turning in his head, trying to make sense of it.

he's started baseball and it's been awesome to find a sport that comes naturally for him.  the kid can hit, and got a couple of homeruns on his first game.  granted, he's playing against other 5-7 year olds who are just learning how to pick up a ball with a mitt and throw it in the right direction, but still.  it's a great boost for his self-confidence and so fun to watch him play.  with other sports he's participated in there's a lot of running involved and he wears out quickly and struggles to keep up with his peers, so this is a great fit.

we had him tested for the possibility of starting growth hormones, with the thought that it may help his underdeveloped muscles catch up.  we researched pros and cons and were sitting on the fence about it,  so we just finally decided to see if it was even an option for him.  after meeting with the specialist who did an evaluation, blood tests and an x-ray, we learned that his growth is behind but not something to be concerned enough right now to pursue GHR.  we'll do follow-ups to make sure he doesn't fall further behind.  

it's nice he's turning more mellow, especially because leah has become the opposite.  her desire for a little control over her life has come into full swing and she and i have hit a rocky patch.  i do my best to pick our battles--holding the line only when i feel it's necessary,  trying to give more slack to her rope so she can feel she's the one at the reins.  i give her devoted and intentional one-on-one attention daily, to fill up her cup.

but you want to know what our biggest arguments are about?  no longer bedtime, which was so last year.  now it's going potty, of all things.  what i do know,  the girl likes to be in control of her bladder.  and she was, until she gave herself a bladder infection for having too much control, and holding for hours upon hours at a time.  so i explained that she needed to listen to her body and take care of it.  and if she wasn't, her body would tell her by getting sick.  but her 4 yr old self isn't making the connection yet, that her short-term control has long-term side effects that resulted in weeks of accidents and antibiotics.

just last week, i finally felt like i was figuring out how to work through this space of control tug-of-war and we reached a silent peace treaty.  i parented caleb so differently, but all of my techniques were failing miserably with leah.  caleb was great with being given choices, and choosing within them.  my approach with leah is so completely the opposite.  as much as i don't love getting firm with her from the beginning, when it comes to this one place, it's what works best.  loving but firm has become my motto and has helped me stay consistent and calm even when she is riled up.

other than that, the beauty inside this little girl continues to take my breath away.  she is so sweet, and full of compassion lately, when we have had to work through our tough times.  overall she's been more outwardly loving... i absolutely hold onto any hug, kiss, and "i love you" she sends my way.  we end each day with me giving her 4 different types of kisses, and i would love more than anything to bottle her up at this age and keep her this way forever.

and then there's june, who i seem to fall more in love with every day.  she is such a great communicator, picking up phrases and words that i've never worked with her on.  she is still so cuddly, and as independent as she is, she still loves to be wherever i am.

her tantrums have taken on a mind of their own and i have to force myself not to laugh while she's shrieking and catapulting her body on the floor when she doesn't get what she wants.  luckily she gets over it quickly, and can easily find happiness in other distractions.

she was sick the past few weeks, probably more sick than she's been in her little life, and i ended up sleeping on her floor with her for over a week.  those late nights killed me with exhaustion, but also held some of my most precious memories with this girl.  i would be falling asleep, when i would feel her soft, chubby little hand stroking my cheek.  i would open my eyes to see her staring at me, with the sweetest smile on her face.  then she would say "i yuv you" and give me a kiss.  i would sing her songs as she snuggled in with her blankies and found myself wanting to stay awake just to watch her eyes get heavy and finally close.

these three kids and their dad are the best part of me.  they fill my soul up with meaning, love and fulfillment in a way i could have never imagined.  and they are the daily reminders of the goodness of God in my life.

and now?

a little video with a dance-off, strader kid style.  along with a small groin-grab from caleb....where does he learn this stuff?

packed.

it's only monday and this week is already going by too fast.  is that even possible?  maybe it's my tendency to pre-stress about what's ahead, wanting it all to go smoothly.  a lot of good things, but just a lot, coming from someone who likes to run a low profile most of the time.

we're starting caleb in baseball tomorrow and we're all pretty excited about it.  this is one sport that might come easily for him, we play a lot of it in the backyard and he's great at hitting the ball....we'll see how the rest goes.

leah's birthday is on wednesday, and that day is packed full, starting with a field trip with her preschool to a dairy farm, then taking she and a couple of her friends to the aquarium, then dinner, presents and cake with the family.  the only thing she's put in a request for is dolphin cupcakes for her field trip and a my little pony cake for her party.  i think she's on a secret mission to cramp my brilliant idea of a store-bought birthday.

thursday i'm going to meet up with some family for lunch, and then somewhere in between these extra things along with the usual, i need to do laundry and pack because on friday afternoon i fly out to the lovely city of provo, utah!  i'm so excited about the weekend, to spend time with my sister and to meet my new nephew {who is doing much better, home from the NICU last week}.  i'm using allegiant airlines, which i initially thought was going to be so much less expensive...that is until i had to pay for my seat both ways and all of the luggage i'm bringing with me, it sure added up quickly.  sneaky.

anyway, here are a few more pictures from a rainstorm a couple of weeks ago.  we've had more rain this winter than i can remember since we've lived here--and a snowstorm last week!--and the kids {and I} have been in heaven.  our backyard turns into massive puddles and i spend most of my time trying to keep june from lapping up the water on the ground like a little puppy.

my goal to get through this week and keep it all together is to get to bed at a decent time.  is 11 pm decent for anyone else?  for me it's nothing short of a miracle.

i've been up late every night for the past 3 weeks or so working on something that i'm excited about, but won't share yet.   there is something to the "out of my comfort zone" theme for 2013.  so far it's pushed me to do things i normally wouldn't have the hootspa to even consider, let alone actually DO.

karaoke, for one:

{singing "somebody to love" with clancy.  the expression on my face here kills me, it looks like i'm in pain, i'd like to think it was taken when i was belting out a high note and just really 'getting into it.'}

yep, it happened.  i was terrified, even though i was singing to a bunch of drunk people at a bar at 1 o'clock in the morning who i knew i'd most likely never see again.  i was still terrified.

which just reminded me that i've never written about my weekend with rachel and clancy!  so like me...sigh.  another time, i'm supposed to be in bed in 28 minutes and need to wrap up this random post.

wishing you a fantastic week!

december phone picture dump!

for my facebook friends, these pictures will be a repeat, but i've got to get them on the blog before i delete them off of my phone.

caleb was asked to sing for our stake baptism day....he did a solo, sang two verses of a song and rocked it.  he told me he wasn't even nervous.  takes after his dad this way--definitely doesn't come from me.  we went out for a cinnamon roll to celebrate afterward.  i love his little face.

took the kids to home depot and thought i was in for another harrowing experience at a store that wasn't very kid-friendly.  what they lack in exciting things for kids to look at,

they make up for in awesome carts.  we were stuck in a line for about 40 minutes,

and the girls were occupied the whole time....

june with her road rage, 

leah with pretending all of the wood and tools were her dolphin friends.

caleb at his christmas program.  i knew he had a couple of speaking lines,

but was really surprised when he stood in front of the microphone 

and sang an entire song

with the rest of the 2nd graders singing in the background behind him.

during the night program, two of the kids in his group didn't show up, 

so his teacher asked if he could say their lines too.  

ben took videos of him while trying to wrangle the girls at the same time.  

{i was at my work christmas party that night & had gone to the morning show}

the shortest kid of the bunch,

but that doesn't let him slow him down one bit.  so proud of this boy.

leah displaying a half-moon while playing at the park.

the kids at the dentist.  cavity free!

one really fun saturday:

the most delicious breakfast i've ever eaten with andrea,

then lunch & shopping with my lovely cousin,

then a date night with benjamin.

i felt like i ate my way through the day.

leah after her preschool field trip to the fire station.

she told me she was never going to take off the hat,

then 5 seconds after i took this picture she snapped herself in the face

with the elastic and got so mad that she yelled, 

"I'M NEVER GOING TO BE A FIRE FIGHTER EVER AGAIN!'

i couldn't stop laughing, which only made things worse.

caleb wrote a story about a "bad day."

and it looks like he's pretty traumatized 

about one day leah scratched his face so hard it bled.

he conveniently left out the part of the story 

when he tried to drag her across the backyard by her ankles

which was why she scratched him in the first place.

moral of the story?  

my kids really love each other.

classic soap-spiked hair in the tub picture.

little miss sunshine.  and her amber teething necklace.

{which really does work, in case you were wondering.}

every morning i have a fruit & protein shake,

and these little mongrels come running as soon as the blender starts up.

we each get a straw, and drink down the glass

in about 30 seconds.

spent veteran's day with a surprising day off for ben,

and decided to make the most of it

joining some friends for a hike,

coming face to face with an enormous tarantula

where i tried not to wet my pants in front of everyone.

and where i finally admitted that 

arizona is kind of pretty.

june in the morning.  i love this picture.

leah in the morning.  i love this one too.  

leah is kind of picky about when she wants to show physical affection, 

so when it's offered i eat it up. 

and i love that she was wrapped around my arm and didn't want to let go.

when june wakes up from her nap in the afternoon, 

we spend time just playing in her room.  

her favorite place to play?  sitting in her toy drawers.

a couple of weeks ago we got together with two of my friends from high school, 

matt & marielle & their families.  

after they left, i realized how rare it is to not only keep in touch with people for that long,

{i've known matt since...3rd grade?  i think?  we've been friends since 9th grade.  and marielle and i have been friends since 10th grade.}

but also to genuinely like the people they have turned out to be.  

and like their spouses and kids!

it was a fun night.

we joined in a baby-sitting swap with some families in our ward,

so once a month we watch 13-15 kids for 3 hours.  

to break up the time, we took them to a park one night & a hot air balloon appeared.

ben had the idea to lay the kids down to spell out "HI" 

and they all started chanting

"LAND-RIGHT-HERE!"

caleb started physical therapy again,

we're trying to re-train his body to strengthen certain muscles that have been weak.

and then re-correct other muscles that have been compensating for the weakness.

you know that competitive nature he was born with?

this is where it's channeled & put to good use.

just an afternoon playing in the backyard with the kids.

the bottom right corner picture is where june randomly smacked leah in the back.

she takes out a lot of her aggression on her older sister, we're working on that.

my home-made version of this sign,

made out of a big framed canvas that i bought for $3 from a yard sale.

june's obsessed with sun glasses, especially mine.

she's also obsessed with sweeping,

she'll randomly pick up the broom throughout the day and go to work.

i do everything i can to encourage this to continue.

during one of our date nights, 

we brought june with us because the couple watching the other kids

just had a baby, and we knew june would be a lot on top of the rest of the bunch.

we had a great time going out to dinner with her, then decided to push our luck

and took her to target to shop for christmas pj's.

an enormous tantrum ensued, she was literally shrieking her way through the store.

so ben tried to console her, validating that he feels the same way 

whenever he enters target.

i laughed and took pictures.

the kids love the trampoline, 

i love their crazy, static-y hair.

leah's imagination continues to go full force.

one night i thought she was totally asleep,

when she suddenly came out of her room wearing a basket and some 

toy bungee things on her hands.  she announced that she was a turtle and  needed to go potty,

and she knew she needed to go because her "shell" 

felt like it was full of pee.

june's new trick.  i love her legs.

on another date, ben and i were grabbing something at a gas station,

and we found this "VOSS" water.  that word is an inside joke with ben's family,

so we snapped a picture with me trying to look sophisticated next to

what is apparently supposed to be some really delicious, extremely over-priced water 

and sent it to them.

one afternoon my friend lisa came over & did my hair...

and while it was setting i had to pick up caleb from school,

so away i went, shower cap and all.

i have no pride.

and here's my hair after the shower cap....

somehow i grew a unibrow and mustache during the ordeal.

took caleb on a date mini-golfing and out for pizza.

my favorite gift under the tree so far.

and that's it!!  

are you ready for christmas?

i know we are!