Saturday, August 28, 2010

lynsey vs. the garbage bags.


i've been at our apartment for about 3.5 hours now, cleaning.

i've filled 5 garbage bags so far, mostly of food from the fridge & freezer that i don't care to bring along to the house.  it's kind of nice to start out with a fresh bag of frozen berries instead of a 3/4 used one, you know?

so anyway.

ben is home with the kids, so i'm flying solo on this final cleaning business.

i had been stacking garbage bags outside, and decided once the pile started taking on a mind of its own that maybe i should take them to the dumpster.

thinking i was maybe superwoman, i grabbed two full garbage bags and hefted them up, only to realize that they were both crazy heavy.  but to try to limit my trips back & forth to the dumpster since it's hotter than you know what outside, i decided to drag them both.  saving not only a round trip, but also my back.

i am so smart.


i'm really not.

because i had filled these babies to the brim with pickle jars, mayo jars, ketchup and teriyaki sauce bottles.  so as i made my way over to the dumpster, unbeknownst to little ol' me, one of the bottoms of the bags split open.  i was feeling like i was such a tough piece of work until i finally realized as i reached the dumpster that i had been littering the parking lot with random glass jars.

i wanted to curse.

but, i didn't.

the bag that had split open was heavy, but luckily i was able to grab the bottom and arch it over the side without dropping anything else.  i then walked around the parking lot, picking up the remains of what i had littered.

and went back for another round.

this time, i tried to carry the next bag, thinking that me dragging the last one on the ground was what had weakened the so-called "hefty" plastic & splitting it.  but unfortunately, the powers that be were really out to humiliate a short, sweating & frustrated girl such as myself today.  

the bag split apart about halfway to the dumpster, again dropping random nasty food all over the parking lot.  i caught on quickly this time, but couldn't stop in the middle of the street because there were some oncoming cars.  so i tried over and over again to grip the bottom of the bag and lift it up with the top.  

unfortunately my technique didn't turn out so well the second time around.  each time that i repeatedly grabbed the bottom of the bag, it continued to shred.  no matter how hard i tried i could not get it to hold together.

so, i did what any girl in my situation would do.

i panicked, and started running.

well the term "running" is used loosely here because i was carrying about 60 lbs of food.  but i sure used all of my efforts to put a good hustle in.  i made it to the dumpster basically carrying the bag in my arms and let out a good, "AAAARGGGHH!" as i threw it over.  i felt like i was channeling either venus or serena williams when they smack that tennis ball as hard as they can during a serve.

and then spent the next 5 minutes again picking up all that had been lost along the way.

as i walked back to the apartment i avoided eye contact with the remaining bags of trash, opened the door and then closed it behind me.

i've got to work up the willpower to finish that job.

anyone wanna come help?



ThE fRoNkS!... said...

So I know this is super random, but I came across your blog and I think you and your family are darling! I was actually looking up church things because I have to give a talk in church tomorrow and google took me to your other church blog. So I clicked on your family blog and here I am! Sorry if you think this is creepy, but I just wanted to say that I loved your post about imagining. So cute! I only have 2 little little ones, they don't imagine yet, but when they do I hope that I will be a good mom like you and do that with them. Sorry this so long, but thanks!

lynsey said...

hey there fRoNkS!

thanks for your comment, it's always so fun to meet new friends. i don't think it's creepy at all, in fact i've met some really incredible people through the land of blog. i really appreciate what you said & hope your talk goes well today!


Rachel H. said...

hahaha Lyns, you are too funny! Sounds to me like you need a) better bags and B) a wagon!! Hope the moving gets finished soon--all that finishing up work is SUCH a drag!!!!