Sunday, October 24, 2010

defending the silver lining.

sometimes, bad things happen to bad people and good things happen to good people.  i love it life goes that way, when karma lives up to her name.

but sometimes, bad things happen to good people.

and a true test of character is to see that happen to someone you love... without being able to stop it or change it or carry it for them... and watch how they endure, and persevere, and rise above.

i've written on here several times about my friend andrea, and tonight i think she deserves an extra moment on the blog.  i don't write just about my kids here, or about my ability to fill my time accomplishing what feels like close to nothing, but i write about what affects me.

andrea has been through more lifetimes than most 80 yr. old's i know.  she has been handed some of the most difficult trials in life and hasn't even reached my golden age of 30 yet.

there are many amazing things about andrea, the list could be a mile long.  her kind heart, her loyalty, her ability to love others unconditionally, the quick forgiveness that she gives to those who repeatedly wrong her, and the way that she stands up for what's right in a humble and soft way.

but my favorite thing about this girl?  

it's the way in which she has not allowed these trials to break her.  instead, she uses them to teach her and those around her and change her for the better.  she always takes the high road and never stoops to the level of others who try to hurt her.  this past year has been extremely difficult on her and while i would love to shout from the rooftops the names of those who have hurt her and the injustices that have been done to her, i know it's not what she would want.

telling her i'm proud of her doesn't even begin to describe how i feel.  i have watched her overcome and continually keep going, and her example is something that has changed me.

there have been a few times in my life that i have met someone that i knew God put in my path to bless me and teach me, and she is one of those people.  

during one of her darkest days, i drove to meet andrea at jason's deli.  over and over again on the long drive there and back, i listened to one song.  i cried my eyes out the whole time and prayed that she could get on the other side of her pain.  and that for just this once, good things could happen to this good person.

the words of the song that struck me that day were these:

"You know it's nothing new
Bad news never had good timing
Then the circle of your friends
Will defend the silver lining"

there are many times andrea has defended that silver lining for me.  telling me that i am strong and capable of handling tough situations, and that good things are coming.  as i sat in that deli with her, i promised myself that i would be there for her.  and defend her silver lining, and let her know that she is strong and capable and deserving of better things to come.

it is almost a year later from that day, and even though the pain is still real and is still there, she is coming through it.  

and i'm not grateful for one second that these things happened to her and that the fall-out is still continuing.  but i am grateful that she is andrea.  and that she is in my life.  and that she is my friend.

and i'm mostly grateful that she has taught me that the heart of life is good.

drizz, this one's for you:


Andrea said...

Well, it's official. I am now in the ugly cry and know of no way out that doesn't involve a diet coke and a cheese danish. I love you. I can't believe you did this...but I love you for it. I have no idea how I am so lucky to have you as my best friend but I am forever grateful for it. You are one of the most amazing women I know and I thank Heavenly Father everyday for you...your day of glory is coming soon on the blog my friend. Oh sweet revenge!

Andrea said...

Oh no! Now I am crying even harder...add one more thing to this post and you will need to show up with oxygen!

Carrie said...

She is a total beauty. I can tell she has a heart of gold and must be a wonderful person if she picked you as a dear friend. Good luck to your friend Andrea and god bless anyone who is quick to forgive those that don't deserve her.

Anonymous said...

Just popping in to say hi! I'll second everything you said about Andrea - I totally love that girl. Glad you have such a wonderful friend in your life. And glad she has you!

Rachel H. said...

I agree--what an extraordinary woman. But I have to add the age old phrase of "takes one to know one!" :) {wink, wink}. You both seriously are incredible...and I am so happy you have such a deep friendship.